This morning I drove to a Starbucks so that I could escape the house and put myself to work on this little blog I’ve got going on here. The last few weeks have been full of many hours of overtime and very little me time. Figured I needed to rectify that…
So I stroll into the Starbucks, order my grande cold brew (sweetened with 2% milk should you ever want to be generous…), sit down with my laptop aaaaand…
…two hours later all I’ve done is gleefully search for flights to London, create a little budget spreadsheet, scan Twitter because ADD, and somewhat daydream about celebrating my 30th birthday in one of my favorite parts of the world.
Let me start by saying this wedding was for my one and only sibling–my little brother. It was a great day full of friends, family, and lots of love (plus some tears). I’m proud of him and I know he and his new bride are very happy…
…I also know he tried to make it so there was alcohol at the reception, but that didn’t work out so here’s where my little story fits in.
This story begins and ends with a glass (or 2) of red wine. (Yes, I’m finishing the wedding contraband as I type this.)
I’ve been to my share of weddings. In fact, this particular wedding was the 6th one in which I was a bridesmaid (number 7 happens next year). Most of those weddings were overflowing with an assortment of beverages, but there’s always the odd wedding that doesn’t, for whatever reason. And no, I don’t think you need alcohol to have a good time. Anyone who knows me knows this. However, let’s all be honest here, it never hurts to have a little [insert your favorite alcoholic beverage here]. (It also helps to get people out on the dance floor. The Electric Slide is wayyy better after a glass or 2.)
So when my brother broke the news to my mom, who broke the news to me that there would be no alcohol served at the wedding, it was time for Plan B, or in our case, Plan V (for vino, of course).
Friends asked me what my game plan was, and it was simple: Get a favorite red wine of mine (so I didn’t have to worry about keeping it cold) and sneak it into the reception. I did contemplate more stealthy methods of executing Plan V including but not limited to a wine bra (not working with a strapless dress, but check them out on Amazon!), a flask (with the option of going prohibition-style with a guarder), and the wine that comes in the mini bottles (not available for my favorite wine). While the bra and guarder options would’ve made for a great story, they didn’t work for my purposes.
So I decided on the simplest form of sneaking my wine in–stick it in a bag and hide it under the table.
Did I mention I had an accomplice? That would be my Mom. She also brought her own bottle in a similar style. Mom dashed off to the dark, empty bar to crack open her wine and add ice (and this is why I chose red instead of white). I, on the other hand, chose to set up shop at the table, crouched down with my Trader Joe’s wine opener and empty cup in hand.
We also brought a few family members to the dark side. When I went to ask one of my aunts if she’d like to partake in a little vino, her response–in a very sassy tone–was, “Is it Saturday?” and actually, yes it was, so I said so. My aunt replied with “Well, okay then.”
And so the bridesmaid turned into a bartender and off I went to the sad, lonely bar with my 2 bottles of wine, pouring a few extra glasses on the sly as if I could be busted at any moment.
Truth be told, I don’t really think anyone cared–or was I just THAT good?
Either way, I was completely ready for the Cha-Cha Slide, The Electric Slide, The Wobble, AND The Cupid Shuffle (which, by the way, I had been calling The Cuban Shuffle for way to long with no one correcting me). Completely makes sense that it wasn’t actually The Cuban Shuffle–I had always wondered what was so Cuban about it.
So, kids, the moral of this story is that if you’re invited to a dry wedding and want to sneak wine in, first, be aware of your options in how to do it (someone please get that wine bra and try it out!), and, second, as long as you’re somewhat discreet, most people aren’t even going to notice. Also, make sure your sassy aunt gets a glass.
And, finally, if you’re a family member/member of the bridal party, you can kind of do what you want anyway, right?
All etiquette aside, the idea of a completely dry wedding reception isn’t ideal. Desperate times call for desperate measures! More on this experience coming soon! (Yes, this is really going to happen…)
I joined Twitter years ago, and I’ll admit, I didn’t understand it. Didn’t really get the hashtag thing. (Ironically, now I work in social media marketing. #sorrynotsorry) I was only ever active during live events worth hate live tweeting. So my account just sort of sat around and came to life on occasion, that is until maybe 3 or so months ago. And it was finally then that I started to realize how rude and nosy this platform is, in a mostly good way once I forget my manners.
Twitter works best if you’ve got your own niche, something you want to actively comment on and engage others with. For me, it’s fangirl-related things (of course). But the funny thing is that in order to use Twitter to its full capacity, I must do many things against my own nature…
Stalk people – It’s kind of like lurking in the shadows, listening to strangers’ conversations. No biggie. Hey, while you’re at it, set notifications so you never miss another tweet from the most stalk-worthy of accounts…
Eavesdrop on conversations… – While you’re stalking, you see someone make a comment that is out of context. No problem, let’s click on it and read the ENTIRE CONVERSATION that you’re not included on.
…And then butt in – No, it’s not rude. Well, I don’t think. Hell, I don’t know. It feels rude. My inner polite police cringes at the thought of inserting my 2 cents into a convo already happening between strangers, but then I do anyway. (Let’s hope this doesn’t translate into real life situations.)
Get included in the Twitter version of a group email – And everyone does the Twitter version of a reply all, but all you can think every time there’s a new mention is “WHEN WILL IT END?”
But then suddenly, you’re interacting and making friends with strangers from around the world who have the same interests as you. You can enter a gif war with your Twitter friends that never ends. Thanks to Twitter, some of your favorite people are just 140 characters away. And sometimes, when you least expect it, they reply or favorite you. You geek out so much over something so simple and then maybe, juuuust maybe, screenshot it to save for later…
Oh, and wine tweets! There’s always room for wine tweets.
I’m Lynsey–a [nearly] 30-something nerdy gal who loves Books, TV, and Film–the stories they hold, authors and screen writers that inspire, the spark of imagination, the many destinations, and everything in between. Oh, and a glass of red wine never hurts either.
In my “third life crisis” I made it my mission to write more. It started out like this:
OMG, I’m turning 30 this year.
What am I doing with my life?
I’m living on my own, have a decent job, dating (unsuccessfully, ugh)…
But I don’t quite remember the last time I was doing something I was super passionate about…
So what’s missing besides Mr. Right?
Well, I hadn’t written in a while and didn’t have a blog. So there’s a start. Time to get cracking on this! Just a short note: This blog is meant to be a writing exercise for me, but I certainly hope others enjoy it as well. I’m going to start by writing (or rambling) about my thoughts, experiences, obsessions…oh and what’s in my glass. So let’s get this party started!
Tonight’s drink of choice: Water. (Sorry, long evening building this blog from scratch–needed to concentrate!)